By Diane Petronille Cilengi | University of Minnesota Crookston Collegiate DECA
Leadership is built on a person’s ability to influence others. If people do not trust you, they will not follow you. And if they do not follow you, it becomes difficult to influence them. This is a direct obstacle to creating meaningful change.
For the longest time, I viewed vulnerability as a threat to leadership. I never believed leaders had to be perfect. I knew no leader had all the answers. What I believed was that leaders should avoid showing uncertainty. I worried that admitting doubts, asking questions, or expressing concern might cause people to lose confidence in my ability to lead.
Then I encountered what I now consider a leadership paradox: "The very things I thought would weaken a leader's influence are often the things that strengthen it." I first began to understand this paradox while serving as a Minnesota Collegiate DECA Association Officer.
The Leader Who Changed My Perspective
One of the people who has most influenced my understanding of leadership is my fellow state officer, Hannah Dahlquist. Hannah and I are separated by nearly a decade in age, but some of the most valuable leadership lessons I have learned came from observing her example. What stands out most about Hannah is her authenticity. Hannah is willing to ask questions that others may hesitate to ask. She is comfortable raising concerns when something doesn't feel right. She communicates honestly, shares her perspective candidly, and genuinely cares about the people around her.
Whether it is checking in on a teammate, offering encouragement, sharing a hug, or helping someone through a difficult day, Hannah leads with her whole heart. For a long time, I viewed those qualities simply as aspects of her personality. Now I recognize them as leadership strengths.
Trust Is Earned Through Honesty
As I watched Hannah serve, I noticed something: people trust her. Not because she projects perfection. Not because she always has the answer. Not because she never expresses uncertainty. People trust her because they know she is genuine. When Hannah speaks, people know they are hearing her honest thoughts. When she offers support, people know it is sincere. When she voices concerns, people understand that they come from a place of deep care for the team and its success.
The vulnerability I once viewed as weakness became one of the reasons others trusted her leadership. That realization challenged my assumptions. I worried that admitting uncertainty would cause people to lose confidence in a leader. What I failed to realize was that people often place far more trust in leaders who are honest about their limitations than in leaders who pretend not to have any.
Self-Awareness Creates Better Leaders
Vulnerability is often misunderstood as emotional exposure for its own sake. I have come to see it differently. Vulnerability is grounded in self-awareness. It requires understanding your own emotions, strengths, limitations, and motivations. When leaders understand themselves, they become better equipped to understand and support others. The ability to navigate conflict, build relationships, and develop strong teams depends on emotional intelligence. Leaders cannot effectively guide people through challenges if they are disconnected from their own experiences and emotions. Vulnerability helps us develop that connection. It allows us to listen more carefully, empathize more deeply, and lead more authentically.
A Lesson I Will Carry Forward
Watching Hannah serve challenged me to become a better leader for her, for our State Officer Team, and for the Minnesota Collegiate DECA Association as a whole. She taught me that vulnerability does not diminish leadership; it strengthens it. It makes leaders more trustworthy because people know they are being genuine. It makes leaders more relatable because people see their humanity. It makes leaders more effective because authentic relationships are the foundation of influence.
Today, when I hear the word vulnerability, I no longer think of weakness. I think of courage. I think of trust. I think of authenticity. I think of leaders like Hannah Dahlquist, whose example reminds me that influence is not built by convincing people you are flawless. Influence is built by showing people you are real.
